Making Friends

As most of you know, R started Kindergarten this year at yet another school. He is presently attending his third school since moving to the Milwaukee, WI area, and I feel just horrible about it. Finding the right school fit has been quite difficult for us, and R is constantly having to make new friends each fall. (I won't bore you with the whole story on why the three schools.) Thankfully, R makes friends rather easily, but the process does still take a bit of time. This year is no exception...

R is presently one of only two new kids in his Kindergarten class as everyone else went to this school last year for what we Wisconsonites call 4K (preschool or nursery school for you Southerners!). R is very outgoing and friendly, and he is getting to know the people in his class, but apparently he thinks that the process is not happening quickly enough. So, he decided to attract friends with something that most every boy loves, especially in the fall....

No, not food (this time!)

A football!

R has had four home addresses in his five years of life. He's had countless hours of therapy (the physical kind) with a total of nine therapists. He's been in three schools and has had somewhere in the neighborhood of 12 brain surgeries. He sounds like he should be a very troubled kid with alot of problems, doesn't he? Well, somewhere along the way, he has learned to cope, adapt, make friends, and be very creative in his problem solving. But, I digress...

R has watched me for five years now treat (err...bribe) our new neighbors and possible friends with baked goods at least a couple of times each year. He has figured out that gifting those around you will result in a bigger gift to you in the long run - friendship. So, R noticed that one 5th grade boy in his school carried a football in his backpack to school every day, and R decided to do the same. The first day, he had reportedly 9 boys from the two Kindergarten classes playing football with him during recess.

The irony...R doesn't even like football to watch or to play.

But, he does REALLY like having friends, and he knows his friends do like football. So, he chooses to be the football guy because he knows that simple little nerf ball will attract friends, and he longs to speed up the process on friendship. He and I have talked about the fact that his ball could get lost at school or that the foam could get holes in it, but he doesn't care. He just wants friends.

I will happily find him a new football is something happens to this one because I just love his attitude. He doesn't complain about having to transition to another new school. He doesn't complain about not having friends. He just looks around and figures out what to do about his current situation.

Makes me think, what are little things I could be doing to be more connective with others an "speed up the process" on friendship instead of complaining??

I learn so much from my little guy...